Wanting it All

If you had asked me when I was pregnant how I was going to handle being a stay-at-home mom and working for myself, I would have told you that I wasn’t worried about it. “Things are going to be fine!” Babies nap so I was going to work when Charlie napped and my mom would babysit once a week and I’d be able to get everything done. I was confident that it would be that easy. I was totally wrong.

You know that saying “I want to do it all. I also want to do absolutely nothing.” This is my dilemma. I have to start by saying that I count my lucky stars every single day that I have the ability to stay home with Charlie because it is without a doubt the best job in the world. However, it feels that I’ve let this business that I’ve worked so hard at over the past few years fall by the wayside and that makes me sad. I know you are all going to comment the sweetest things and tell me I’m doing a great job and thank you in advance, but if I’m being honest it doesn’t feel that way.

The problem is that when Charlie sleeps, I rush to clean up our apartment, give Webster some love, take a shower, throw in a load of laundry and by the time I should sit down to work, I either want to sleep or Charlie wakes up and our day starts again. When Dave gets home and relieves me of mom duties, I just want to sit and be and spend time with my family (or find a few minutes to myself). My brain feels pulled in so many different directions and the part that fuels my creative juices is a little faded at the moment.

Charlie is in the BEST stage. He is giggling all the time, grabbing everything, chewing on anything he can get his hands on and just so full of life. It’s so hard to let him play while I try to focus on work because the reality is I’d rather be watching him. I know this situation is so much easier than most working moms who are dropping their babies off at day care while they work a 9-5 – props to you, super mom’s! I admire you so much.

I guess what I’m saying is that for now, I’m going to put my focus where it should be.

I’d love to know what you’d like to see on S&S moving forward. I don’t want to cloud your feeds with posts that I threw together at the last minute. Quality over quantity – you know what I mean? So what do you love! Fashion, personal style, collages, baby, motherhood, lifestyle, recipes? I’d love your feedback so I make sure that S&S stays one of your favorites.

Thanks for always hanging by when things get slow! You can always see more day to day on my instagram or snapchat @ lizadamsss.

xoxo

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